


Heavy

by HDLynn



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, The Mandalorian (TV)
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, F/M, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Melancholy, Mild Language, One-Shot, some hints of past anxiety and/or depression
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-28
Updated: 2020-08-28
Packaged: 2021-03-06 18:13:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,402
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26163190
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HDLynn/pseuds/HDLynn
Summary: After time spent apart from your riduur you find yourself getting emotional one night with little comfort in sight.
Relationships: Din Djarin/Reader, Din Djarin/You, The Mandalorian (The Mandalorian TV)/Reader, The Mandalorian (The Mandalorian TV)/You
Kudos: 71
Collections: Mando has my heart





	Heavy

When Din had left the house over a week ago you had been fine. You had given him one last lingering kiss after he had brushed a large hand over the child’s ears and fuzzy head. Din hummed into your lips as you both had lingered in the touch, knowing that he would have to slip the helmet back on and go once you separated.

And you had been fine, the first few days. 

The baby kept you busy, he was forever a curious and precocious foundling. Ever since you’d first met Din and the child you had watched the little green one blossom and become more open and expressive. Not unlike how his buir had and you had both done. There was also plenty of work to do in the little garden area with planting for the burgeoning spring and weeding, or helping out the neighbor, Ilani, with her weaving. She was a sweet lady and she and her husband had become good friends of yours as you had settled in.

Today, though, you had been off the entire day. Maybe you were just tired of constantly waking up with the other half of the bed cold and undisturbed. 

With the child sleeping in his little bed, tucked in under a thicker fuzzy blanket to ward off the chill that still settled over the house since the weather was still breaking free from the winter season.

You didn’t want to even do your normal evening rituals, but did them anyway, knowing you’d feel even worse if you didn’t. Cleaning up the kitchen while some of your favorite night-time tea brewed. The mug warmed your hands but the first sip just didn’t… hit the spot and you couldn’t even explain why you knew it just wouldn’t.

The tea being a bust, you ended up taking a steaming hot shower in hopes that the warmth of the water would be soothing. It didn’t. Even though you had taken your time you still couldn’t relax even as you had turned the hot water up until your skin was practically humming with how warm you were. Your favorite scented soap somehow smelled extremely artificial when it normally didn’t.

Feeling very lost and alone in the dark quiet of the house, you crawled into the chilly bed and suddenly knew what you had been feeling all day as it swallowed you whole. You were lonely, bone achingly so. This wasn’t the first time this had happened, but it was the first time since having become Din’s riduur. 

Lonely and throbbing, as if your heart was spilling out of your chest, leaving the rest of you cold, you tried to blink back the tears suddenly gathering in your eyes. You failed. The salty liquid gathered too quickly and was soon rolling down your cheeks and chin as you bit back first one sob and then another. Trying to muffle the choked off sounds with a hand, you collapsed inward, curling up as tightly as you could, gathering Din’s pillow to your chest.

The darkness of the room swept in heavily as Din’s scent surrounded you, warmly musky and also the familiar citrus of his shampoo, it was enough to comfort for a moment. As the fabric and the pillow filling started to warm up to your body, you tried to take a shuddering breath to calm yourself. It was fine, you had been able to spend the past several nights alone, this one didn’t have to be different. Why did it feel different? You could go to sleep without Din by your side, after all, you had slept alone for years before him as well.

_But you’re going to wake up alone again_ — your brain supplied unprompted, right as you’d started to get a handle on things.

The night thrummed with a bone-deep ache that sank into your very marrow, washing over you like a sudden dark tide. Overwhelmed, an ugly sob found its way out, and then one after the other. 

“Kriff,” the curse coming out fractured and wet. Your body went hot and sweaty as you continued crying. You wanted to kick off all the blankets, but you couldn’t because wrapping yourself up in them tighter was one of the few things keeping you even slightly grounded right now.

Giving up on holding it in, you just let yourself cry into the pillow, burrowing into the blankets and feelings. 

You must have eventually cried yourself to sleep for the next thing you knew you were gently being woken up, hearing your name spoken by a hushed, yet very familiar rasping voice.

Blinking in the dull light filtering in from your little shared bathroom, you found Din sitting on the edge of your side of the bed.

You croaked out his name, sounding quite horrific indeed even as you rolled over instinctively. Abandoning the pillow for the real thing, you burrowed as much as you could into the warmth of your riduur’s leg and thigh.

“Ner cyare…” Din brushed a warm, dry hand over your forehead. “What’s wrong?”

“M’fine,” you lied even as you grimaced at how stuffed up your nose still was from the crying session earlier. You, apparently, hadn’t been sleeping long at all, your eyes were probably still bloodshot as well.

Din made an incredulous sound, one eyebrow raised as one of his large calloused thumbs began to brush over your puffy cheeks and the tear stains there.

Sniffling slightly, you couldn’t help but grimace at how snotty and nasally you were sounding, even as you nuzzle into his tender touches.

“I just… I was feeling really lonely,” you tried to explain, suddenly feeling guilty at the confession. After all, you were able to stay in your little house with the kid, spend time with the neighbors and friends while Din was out doing his job. His often very dangerous job to provide for your tribe and his little aliit, and he was coming home to you holding a pity party for yourself. 

“I’m sorry, you just got home and I’m just a kriffing mess.”

Din gently but firmly shushed you, knowing you too well now and probably knowing you were about to spiral into a rambling session.

“You’re my riduur, you don’t need to be sorry for feeling a certain way,” Din said firmly. “I’ll always listen to you, you know that, right?”

Feeling slightly abashed, you nodded sheepishly.

“Scoot over,” Din instructed gently, helping you do so while also unwrapping you from your cocoon of blankets that you had pulled up and completely untucked in your need to feel swaddled. 

Once he had slid into the bed, you rolled over so that he could nestle against you like he so often did. Your back came to rest firming against his chest, his legs bending slightly to match yours while Din’s face burrowed into your hair with a sigh.

As the warmth from him seeped into you, familiar and comforting, you could feel your body starting to relax. You concentrated on your breathing and then on his, until it felt like each inhale and exhale was in sync. You were warm and fuzzy and close to slipping back into a comfortable unconsciousness when Din spoke up.

“Can I tell you something?” Din asked, a hand coming to squeeze your hip before reaching around to pull you even closer in.

You hummed before responding, “Course.”

“I don’t always sleep well without you, either,” he admitted softly.

Shifting so you could roll over to face him better, you see his dark brown eyes look into yours as they shine in the darkness.

“You’ve never said anything…” you trailed off as you found his scruffy jaw with one hand.

He turned his face and pressed a kiss into your palm, eyes closing for a moment as you felt him smile ruefully into your skin.

“I didn’t want to burden you with it,” he admitted, before giving you a knowing look, “just like you were trying to not do with me.”

Letting out a still slightly wet-sounding laugh, you let Din snuggle against you tightly again, exchanging a few slow, soft kisses.

“Maker,” you murmured, brushing your nose against Din’s and then over his cheek when you both pulled slightly apart. “When are we going to learn?”

Your riduur hummed, his hand solid and warm at your side, “I think we have learned and still are.”

~*~*~

**Author's Note:**

> Translations:  
> Cyare - beloved  
> Riduur - spouse  
> Aliit - family / clan  
> Cyare’ika - darling / sweetheart
> 
> A/N: The title was inspired by the song Heavy by Birdtalker


End file.
